Happy Birthday!!! :)

Happy B’day!

Happy Birthday! 🎈🎈🎈

Happy birthday! 😊

Happy Birthday!

Happy birthday Duenan. Hope all your wishes come true. 🎉🎂

Hippy birdies!

Happy birthday 🎈🎂 hope your dad’s ok 🙏

Happy birthday! 🥳🎂

Happy birthday! Hope you’ve heard from your dad by now.

Happy Birfday. 🎂

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Happy birthday!! I’m glad you get to treat yourself a bit today after all you’ve been through. I hope you have a really relaxing day where even for a bit you can feel recharged and secure.

I’m grateful for the roof over my family’s heads and for generally being a calm person. Elder said the other day that he misses me being around during the day “because you’ve got this aura of calm around you.” 🥹This is one of the nicest things he’s ever said to me, to anyone.

I am grateful for savlon antisceptic cream.

Over the last few weeks have been so uncoordinated in the gardn, kitchen, moving stuff and sharpening knifes that 100yrs ago would probably need some sort of amputation.

I’m grateful for finding an unused Brother colour laser printer for $100 on Gumtree, and lunch in the sun with a friend at friends of the earth on Smith st.

I’m grateful for gyoza!!! And for tram drivers that dgaf if you fare evade for a couple of stops. And for the tax return I did yesterday… and this little pack of Victorian grown hojicha that a colleague gave me.

Those orchids are beautiful! I’m grateful for the abundance of movies, tv and books available so easily without leaving home. It’s nice to chill out at home on a Sunday afternoon and pick entertainment on a whim.

I’m grateful for being able to catch up with a friend yesterday to celebrate my birthday.

Was nice to get out and be social but it was still deathly cold.

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I’m grateful to have got some decluttering done and cleared quite a few boxes from storage. I have a hard time parting with stuff for a number of reasons, so this was a big deal for me. Still heaps to go but it’s good progress.

I am grateful for off the rack premade clothes. Sure beats processing hides, spinning wool and making clothes myself.

I bought some jonquils yesterday and they’re like little patches of sunshine throughout the house, brightening my mood. I’m also grateful for lazy Sundays, crosswords, tea, and blankets.

Grateful that my headache is gone for the moment

For fluffybutt

And for the 4 interviews I have this week. With any luck, on Tuesday I’ll be grateful to have a job

Waiter: “Enjoy your meal!”

Me: “You too!”

Er…. Lemon Party!

Beautiful day for some gardening. I love to work through all the things that are pissing me off with a few hours’ hard work outside, and a full green bin is very satisfying.

If this stage in life is not conducive to a relationship, or is pleasant enough without one, then you’re under no obligation to have one, regardless of the opinions of family and friends. I have a lot of regrets over how little time of my younger life I’ve really lived for me.

Otherwise, I think the important thing is to find someone who wants the same as you, no matter what that is. If you’re a “meet in the middle,” compromising person then it’s important that the person you’re with also has those qualities, or you’ll find you’re always the one having to be flexible, and may end up feeling taken advantage of. If you’re an individualist who wants to have a lot of independence and “room to move” within a relationship, and can’t bear the thought of “living in someone else’s pockets” then it’s vital to live true to that while that’s how your life is. A couple of friends of mine are very career forward people, spend a lot of time separate from each other due to the demands of their careers, but undeniably love and respect each other and aren’t clingy. It’s perfect for them. How do you know how it’s going to be with someone? You don’t always, or you think you know people but then they change, or you find out things you didn’t know. The arrival of children can complicate things that before seemed much simpler and more straightforward.

Love makes you compromise. Love makes you sacrifice. If you have love for one another those things are easier.

I sacrificed a lot for someone who hurt me for over 8 years, in varying ways. I grew up abused and it set me up for abuse later on because I had no idea what was normal. I almost had a kid with the cunt (thank fuck I made my own money and bought a plan b pill).

But I would never let myself do that again. I know so much more now, about people, the world, and right and wrong. I got extremely lucky my one-night-stand turned out to be my person. We’re better together than we are separately. But if I hadn’t of met my current partner, I think I’d still be single after leaving my ex. Dating seems so dangerous now for vagina-owners (what with the tater-tots and “alpha” male shite).

I’d never change myself ever again for another person. I’d compromise (like quitting smoking), but not on the big things (buying a house, having kids, etc).

@wscholermann @Seagoon_ Fatherhood means - after a while you prefer the crust. All relationships involve some form of compromise. It takes a lifetime to find a good one and maintain it. My marriage and family life is worth it. I see more material on throuples and other arrangements, but that stuff is for my kids gen to work out - looks like a lot more work

I’m on the other side of the fence.

Heartbreak and wasted time is a small price to pay for finding someone to share your life and love with.

Our society values individualism to such a degree, that the idea of sacrificing something for someone you love seems unfair or that you’re “losing” something.

I’ve noticed it with people I’ve dated that are western. Nothing wrong with it, it’s just different.

But it never sat well with me. Seems a bit transactional…

Admittedly my culture is different, so that’s probably why I don’t mind compromise. In a way, it’s an expected part of life. And so we work with that instead of fighting it.

That said, there are fundamental aspects of who I am that I cannot compromise on. Because if I did, I’d end up resenting the person I’m supposed to love.

/mild rant

The thing is, compromise doesn’t always start out as effort. Early on in a relationship (or maybe youth is a factor?) it can feel easy to work with differences. And then over the years as we grow and mature sometimes our wants, needs and habits evolve and set firmer. Our world view can change, our life goals can change. But you might still love the person you’re with so you continue to try and make it work. Sometimes that works out and the relationships stays strong, sometimes it doesn’t. I think if I was starting over again at my age I too would be a lot less flexible in what I wanted in a partner. I know myself better.

The other reason why people might stay in non-perfect relationships is that the way our society works, it’s centred around a couple being the primary relationship unit. So doing things like housing, child rearing, holiday companion, someone to help if you’re sick, someone to chat to if you had a bad day at work, etc, are all often done with a partner. Without a partner it can be hard work to build a network that can fill those roles, or you have to be happy to do it on your own. So yes there’s compromises, but if the partners value the companionship enough they may choose to tolerate the annoyances and personality differences.

do you have one of the systems where the guy saying evacuate now, emergency sounds like pete smith from the old copperart ads?

After having alarms go off due to someone cooking so many times, I simply ignore the alarm my apartment building.

This mild stuffed up ears and nose can go in the bin.

A friend of mine passed away less than 2 months ago, and now her son has messed up big time (no sympathy, he really screwed up in a stupid unnecessary way) and is going to jail, I’d say for a long time. His boys lost their beloved Nan and now their Dad in less than 2 months and I’m pissed off about it. Also, the oldest of the boys is friends with my boy but I don’t know the mum, so they probably won’t see each other anymore. The kids are nice kids, but their little world has changed so much in such a short time, and I really feel for them.

Punched a wall yesterday removing render and now have a raw knuckle that is all swollen and nonworky. I need that finger to pick my nose, dammit

I am utterly ungrateful for the stupid dangling bits on the seam of my socks that have given me a blister

I put a studio subwoofer (weighs about 50kg) straight into a wall yesterday trying to get it down stairs on a trolley. Such a stupid mistake. I’ve fixed the hole (sort of) but everytime I walk past I just shake my head :(

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Amen.

I broke something even more at work by attempting to fix it. And my headlight also died. The way the car is means I might have to take the whole front panel off to change it.

Last night was the first night post-solstice I noticed the sunset lasting a little longer. Thank goddess.