Weather forecast today (Melbourne CBD, 3000): min - 14°C, max - 24°C. 90% chance of no rain

  • TinyBreak
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    2 days ago

    trying on some new shorts in the change room, walk in close the blind pull my pants down and just stare at myself in the mirror for like a good 5 seconds thinking “something isnt right…” takes me that long to realize its cause I’m just standing there with my dick out cause I’ve stupidly removed my briefs as well! I came back to my office and tried to use apple pay to access the lifts rather than my lanyard, another 5-10 second delay as I grapple with “why did this not work the way I expected”.

    Jesus, dont let me touch anything important today my brain is cooked.

    • MeanElevator
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      2 days ago

      Go home. Go bed. Reboot.

      I spent a few minutes trying to pay for shoes with my Library card once. Happens to the best of us.

      • mysticgreg
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        2 days ago

        Last week I grabbed my work swipe card as i walked up to the door of my house, and started moving it toward an imaginary card reader where one would normally be on a work door.

        I do not have electronic locks at home.

        Also, I haven’t needed to use a physical pass to open the doors at work for over a year, when they moved to a new system.

        Brains are stupid.

    • indisin
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      2 days ago

      Those days are the days you tell your team “I’m going to accidentally cause more harm than good today, it’s best I clock off early. See you tomorrow”.

      • BakuOP
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        2 days ago

        When I was in NSW I was holding my myki to the opal reader trying to figure out why it wasn’t working

    • Rusty Raven M
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      2 days ago

      My favourite is trying to swipe my work pass to open my locker.