• StudSpud The Starchy
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    9 months ago
    rant about dumb ex again

    Ugh. After my dumbass fuckwit ex msgd and tried to gaslight me last me, I reported their profile on FB for nonsense. Obviously it was rejected. Partner says I shouldn’t have, because I showed I hadn’t grown like my ex said. That I should have taken the high road.

    Fuck the high road. Fuck the fucking high road. I took the high road the entire time I was with my ex. You try losing 8 years to an abusive fucktard and then you take the high road. I’m tired of taking the high road. I don’t care that I “played right into their hands”. I understand shouldn’t have done it, it was a moment of weakness, but I don’t regret it and I don’t feel bad about it. I had no fucking agency to do anything, Brittany Higgins case has ensure I will never report the heinous shit they did. I reject the high fucking road. I have entertained so many petty revenge plans (envelopes of shit or glitter, signing them up to religious orgs, ecetera) but I always took that stupid high road. But one fucking nonsense report apparently makes that all meaningless. I will never have justice, I will never see them be held accountable for their crimes. But fuck me for being petty. I’m tired of victims being told to be better.

    I think I’m triggered, gotta distract myself and perhaps I’ll feel differently.

    Fuck.

    • Duenan
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      9 months ago

      I think you should block him and cut all further contact from him if you can.

      It’s not really good for you and he’ll continue to do what he does which is exactly what he wants

      Don’t let him win. You’re strong and amazing and he doesn’t deserve you in his life.

      • StudSpud The Starchy
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        9 months ago

        She is blocked, the throwaway they used is deleted anyway, and they don’t use their old reddit account lol.

        One last thing I’ll do, is make my own throwaway and post their message/letter to unsent letters. Just gotta put it where it should have gone in the first place.

        I haven’t seen or spoken to them since early 2019. This was the first contact we’ve had since then. I don’t believe it will happen again because I was quite sassy at them lol

        I agree with you completely though. It just hurts. I really appreciate this message, sincerely. You totally right 💜

        • Duenan
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          9 months ago

          Oh it’s a throwaway? That’s not very helpful at all.

          Might be good for you but I’m not an expert on those things I must admit.

          Whether they’re aware of it or not their behaviour is unacceptable and it should never come at the expense of you and your feelings and your wellbeing.

          They could end up repeating it again but I suggest not talking to them directly as that only gives them what they want, writing ghost letters to get your feelings out would be better.

          I’m sorry that it hurts, some are slow to heal, some might never go away but we have to all keep moving forward and you’re in a good place now and that’s something you should be proud of

    • Seagoon_OP
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      9 months ago

      so many hugs

      the only good road is the road outta there

      tell all your friends and family what he did

      And how do arseholes do it? How do they steal and abuse and get away with it?

      I think it’s chutzpah, they know people don’t fight back.

      • StudSpud The Starchy
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        9 months ago

        I have a pinned post on FB detailing everything she did. Everyone who knew her and me, knows what happened and what they did. Some don’t believe, and they were unfriended and removed immediately. The rest blocked her lol.

        I tried to leave so many times, but the gaslighting and trauma-bonding was intense.

        They do it and get away with it, because the system lets them. Because victims have to relive their trauma over and over just to maybe get a conviction. The system is not kind to those who survived.

        We are strong, though, purely because we are good humans. She will never break me again.

        • Seagoon_OP
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          9 months ago

          my exFIL had an abusive wife but because she was a little old lady who had spent years setting up a victim story it was going to be impossible to sue her for forging exFIL’s will

          They plan this shit. I am sure of it. They know the system and play it.