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  • Sir_ListerOfSmeg
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    1 year ago

    PSA to remind people to not let their mind imagine crazy scenarios.

    Friend had been distant all week and not replying to texts so I thought they’d had enough of me or I’d said something wrong.

    Sent them a text saying “Hey. If you’ve got a few free minutes today can you call for a quick chat?” Less than half an hour later they called me and I got to hear about all the crap going on in their life and it cheered both of us up.

    Sometimes people just retreat into themselves when life gets hard or hectic and need a friend to draw them out.

    Be that friend.

    • Duenan
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      1 year ago

      I feel like retreating and I guess I have been hiding away from all my friends and family though last night I reached out to my dad because I felt like I had to finally.

      This place is my last bastion of contact with people because I’m finding it real hard of late and want to hide away and disappear quite honestly.

        • Duenan
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          1 year ago

          Thank you so much for your well wishes.

          Trying my best but I never feel it’s enough.

            • Duenan
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              1 year ago

              Just I wished I had listened more to my partner.

              She told me to stop paying for her medical stuff incase I had an emergency or something happened and now I’m in that spot where my basic needs are suffering. (Washing machine)

              But what sort of a partner would I be if I didn’t try my best to help her?

                • Duenan
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                  1 year ago

                  Yeah. I think about what I had done and keep replaying it and cursing myself for choosing or making a decision.

                  If I didn’t try and wash my oodie I wouldn’t have broken my washing machine.

                  To think about what’s ahead as well, I know it might not seem like a big problem but it’s one of the few comforts I didn’t want to go without.

                  I guess maybe what I might do is I wash and taking my stuff to a dryer and pay for the use of a dryer.

      • Sir_ListerOfSmeg
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        1 year ago

        Yeah reaching out can be hard when struggling.

        Good that you could find it in you to reach out. It takes strength. Many won’t reach out at all and just suffer in silence for an eternity.

        My friend tries so hard to be the strong and reliable father, husband, and son, and just soldiers on.

        He forgets to reach out for someone to help him cause he’s too busy helping everyone else.

        • Duenan
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          1 year ago

          My washing machine broke halfway yesterday which is why I reach out to my dad, I was anxious and needed to talk because I’m financially at rock bottom having had to support my partner with her medical bills for the past 3 and a half years.

          Mind you I haven’t come up with a solution other than to see how I can handle drip drying wet clothes first or finding cheap or free replacement.

          I’ll have to see what happens when i do the next wash and see what happens.

          Ever with reaching out it doesn’t help with the problems other than airing them out.

          • Sir_ListerOfSmeg
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            1 year ago

            Airing things out with loved ones them fixes more than you realise at the time.

            It’s just not tangible

            • Duenan
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              1 year ago

              I hope so.

              With my dad he sometimes tries to overcompensate because he wasn’t around when I was growing up and feels like it was a missed chance so his input can come to be a little heavy sometimes.

    • the_procrastinata
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      1 year ago

      What scenario should I not be imagining for a friend who stopped responding to texts for minimum a week each time and cancelled two catch ups, after not being able to catch up for almost 2 months because they were so busy? I’m reading signals to stop contacting them.