• just_kitten
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    5 months ago
    Strange but relevant dream...

    I dreamt that I was resting against someone I barely know (I met her at some environmental workshop many many years ago and never stayed in touch beyond seeing her fb posts, but she is gentle and soft spoken, so acted like some kind of vaguely familiar avatar)

    We were seated on a shaded amphitheatre near a sunlit park, watching the breeze rustle the trees and far off-people ambling along the paths, kids playing on the grass, still water reflecting a blue sky, the hint of a guitar strummed in the distance… some tan-coloured bulldogs were also prowling outside the amphitheatre, but ornate wrought iron black gates around the periphery prevented them from coming in. They were quiet and observant.

    After a while, the person asked me softly whether I’ve rested well and why, and I started going on about how I’m so tired, but it’s been hard to sleep on holiday because of the feeling that something always needs to be organised, and I’ve never felt like I had enough time to just allow myself to completely relax into the space. In saying that, I felt a pang of sadness knowing that it was sunny, so I had to be on a holiday.

    “At this rate you’ll never have time,” the avatar said, “there’s always something that needs doing next, for as long as you’re alive.”

    “But this time was a lot easier,” I replied, “maybe because you were there and I felt like you were in such a state of peace and calm yourself, that I had the permission to rest as well. Or maybe it’s this place, because it’s not real,” and I looked at the dogs warily as one sat itself a short distance from us behind the gate and started a quiet, low growl.

    “Although it would be nice if those dogs weren’t here,” I added. “Are they yours? Normally I’d be on edge with these dogs around, but it was so comfortable and serene earlier that I felt transported to my childhood years. I would’ve loved it to continue.”

    The avatar said nothing but smiled sweetly. It was too good to be true, I knew it. The growling started getting louder and was breaking my immersion; I had to show her that I wouldn’t be safe once I left her little sacred area, so I turned around and leaned over a step to reach my water bottle…

    … and almost immediately, I felt the angry breath of a bulldog on my neck as its teeth sank into my jugular, its snarling abruptly loud, right next to my ear. My entire being went limp in surrender except to notice from the corner of my eye that the avatar was still smiling blissfully onto the Elysium beyond, as if I were invisible.

    I could feel myself fading fast even as adrenaline coursed through my veins, so I summoned what energy I could to let out a weak yelp…

    …which translated to real life, and I woke up.

    I guess that was trying to tell me something…

    • SpinMeAround
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      5 months ago

      There’s a lot to unpack there, wow! What a beautiful piece of writing though, nicely done!

      • mysticgreg
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        5 months ago

        Came here to say the same thing about how well written that was - time for you to write a short story I think! =)

        • just_kitten
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          5 months ago

          Aw thanks you guys, I thought it was pretty disjointed word salad but I admittedly got caught up in a poetic mood halfway through. I do get very vivid dreams from time to time and they are so symbolic and emotionally affecting that writing them out tends to have interesting results

      • just_kitten
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        5 months ago

        Yes! Actually even though it was a really vivid dream with a bad ending, it’s helped my subconscious process some emotions (writing it all out helped a lot, too). It’s been a great day, actually, feeling like I’m shedding the post holiday blurgh and maybe coming to terms with the weather on a physical level. Next two days are more challenging, let’s see how I go