I couldn’t get to sleep last night. Melatonin was no help. I was so tired I couldn’t open my eyes, but I just couldn’t sleep.
Then when I did get to sleep, I had another bad dream. This one didn’t involve death like the last few, but I got really angry in my dream and broke everything in my path and hurt a lot of people. I hate those kinds of dreams, because they feel so realistic while I’m in them and then about half way through the dream I realise I’ve mega screwed up and then end up dealing with the fallout while I’m still dreaming. And then after I wake up it’s a combination of relief that I’m not rotting away in a dingey jail cell somewhere, but also terrifying because it makes me wonder if I am actually capable of hurting people irl
And then after I woke up I realised I’d slept in until 1pm. But in my defence, the watch tells me I was tossing and turning until 5:30
Yep. Like Goonsey said it is normal but that doesn’t mean it’s nice. My brain dredges up all sorts of stuff when I sleep. Over the years I have kinda learned to deal with it and even appreciate it a bit - It’s my brain processing all the stuff and filing it where it needs to go.
One thing I find really helpful is to just lay there for a bit when I wake up, with my eyes closed think about what I am feeling inside (is there somewhere hurting? Stressed?) and to think back on what I dreamt. Kinda say thanks brain for processing and remind myself it was a dream and I am safe now. And to then think about where I am in details - what do the sheets feel like, what can I hear, that sort of thing. Just breathe in that in between space and basically put down the night stuff so I can go into the day clean. Or at worst, cut myself some slack because it was a rough night.
Everyone has their own thing - just sharing my little process in case it helps.
I couldn’t get to sleep last night. Melatonin was no help. I was so tired I couldn’t open my eyes, but I just couldn’t sleep.
Then when I did get to sleep, I had another bad dream. This one didn’t involve death like the last few, but I got really angry in my dream and broke everything in my path and hurt a lot of people. I hate those kinds of dreams, because they feel so realistic while I’m in them and then about half way through the dream I realise I’ve mega screwed up and then end up dealing with the fallout while I’m still dreaming. And then after I wake up it’s a combination of relief that I’m not rotting away in a dingey jail cell somewhere, but also terrifying because it makes me wonder if I am actually capable of hurting people irl
And then after I woke up I realised I’d slept in until 1pm. But in my defence, the watch tells me I was tossing and turning until 5:30
Yep. Like Goonsey said it is normal but that doesn’t mean it’s nice. My brain dredges up all sorts of stuff when I sleep. Over the years I have kinda learned to deal with it and even appreciate it a bit - It’s my brain processing all the stuff and filing it where it needs to go.
One thing I find really helpful is to just lay there for a bit when I wake up, with my eyes closed think about what I am feeling inside (is there somewhere hurting? Stressed?) and to think back on what I dreamt. Kinda say thanks brain for processing and remind myself it was a dream and I am safe now. And to then think about where I am in details - what do the sheets feel like, what can I hear, that sort of thing. Just breathe in that in between space and basically put down the night stuff so I can go into the day clean. Or at worst, cut myself some slack because it was a rough night.
Everyone has their own thing - just sharing my little process in case it helps.
sounds a bit like some stress from all the recent events you’ve endured
all perfectly normal, you’ll be fine, just talk to your counsellor
so many hugs 🫂🫂🫂