I had the stupid idea of downloading Hinge as one of my Sunday Sleep Deprivation Mishaps. As soon as I downloaded it, a guy who I matched with two years ago on a different app sends me a rose.
Now this guy asked me on a date after talking for a while (not making that mistake again) and at first I said yes. But the next day, I said no and apologised. He tells me that I did him dirty, he’s the most depressed he’s been in five years, he was going to organise a beach date and buy me flowers, he couldn’t celebrate his friend’s exciting news when he saw my message, he told his family about me, yada yada yada. I thought I was bad but this was like a whole new level of desperation and I noped tf out immediately. Dude would also compare me to girls he was going out on dates with and telling me about his date fails. Put me on pedestal. It’s not fair to anyone involved to put someone on a pedestal. I don’t think it’s something that people are really aware of sometimes, though.
Some people really need to be okay with being alone. I guess a relationship would be nice one day, but I love my peace :) and even though it seems like being on the apps could increase the chance, I’m just going to live my life. If it happens, nice. If it doesn’t, then so be it.
If you chase butterflies, they’ll fly away. If you build a nice garden, you might attract butterflies. If no butterflies, you will have built a beautiful garden for yourself. I’m building my garden :)
My history with relationships is different from yours, but some of the lessons are the same I think. It’s important to know ourselves, to cultivate our own sense of self, to endeavour to be the person you are, and live authentically, true to yourself.
It’s easy to lose our sense of self within an incompatible relationship. We mould ourselves to fit with our partner, and when incompatible, it’s to our own detriment.
To indulge in ourselves, be ourselves without answering to anybody, without being needed or clung to, is a great way to grow confidence. Confidence in our self, in our sense of worth in this world, our place in the universe.
You are intelligent, articulate, clever, and beautiful. You do beautiful, human things. You don’t need apps to find connection; human connection is formed by being together in person, doing something together. I know you are awesome, I believe in you 💜
I had the stupid idea of downloading Hinge as one of my Sunday Sleep Deprivation Mishaps. As soon as I downloaded it, a guy who I matched with two years ago on a different app sends me a rose.
Now this guy asked me on a date after talking for a while (not making that mistake again) and at first I said yes. But the next day, I said no and apologised. He tells me that I did him dirty, he’s the most depressed he’s been in five years, he was going to organise a beach date and buy me flowers, he couldn’t celebrate his friend’s exciting news when he saw my message, he told his family about me, yada yada yada. I thought I was bad but this was like a whole new level of desperation and I noped tf out immediately. Dude would also compare me to girls he was going out on dates with and telling me about his date fails. Put me on pedestal. It’s not fair to anyone involved to put someone on a pedestal. I don’t think it’s something that people are really aware of sometimes, though.
Some people really need to be okay with being alone. I guess a relationship would be nice one day, but I love my peace :) and even though it seems like being on the apps could increase the chance, I’m just going to live my life. If it happens, nice. If it doesn’t, then so be it.
If you chase butterflies, they’ll fly away. If you build a nice garden, you might attract butterflies. If no butterflies, you will have built a beautiful garden for yourself. I’m building my garden :)
My history with relationships is different from yours, but some of the lessons are the same I think. It’s important to know ourselves, to cultivate our own sense of self, to endeavour to be the person you are, and live authentically, true to yourself.
It’s easy to lose our sense of self within an incompatible relationship. We mould ourselves to fit with our partner, and when incompatible, it’s to our own detriment.
To indulge in ourselves, be ourselves without answering to anybody, without being needed or clung to, is a great way to grow confidence. Confidence in our self, in our sense of worth in this world, our place in the universe.
You are intelligent, articulate, clever, and beautiful. You do beautiful, human things. You don’t need apps to find connection; human connection is formed by being together in person, doing something together. I know you are awesome, I believe in you 💜
Thank you Spud <3
yeah, you barely know the guy , he barely knows you, all the guilt trips and the pedestal thing , those are huge red flags
and what spud said, you can do things together with a partner but you have to build your own life too
I find confidence in doing things, anything really.
And I don’t ever ask permission to like or dislike something
Don’t you live at home with your mum?
I do. In this case, I meant being alone as in enjoying one’s own company and not needing a relationship to feel satisfied.