• Rusty Raven M
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    11 months ago

    I’m sorry to hear you have had a bad year, but setting fire to things tends not to make the next year better. It is mostly effective in getting the Fire Brigade to come for a visit, and potentially the Police and Ambulance too (especially if you light something on fire inside).

    May I suggest the following alternative actions:

    Interperative Dance: start with a dramatic re-enactment of past troubles, have an interlude of “shaking it off” Taylor Swift style, then enact what you hope to happen in the new year.

    Artistic Homeopathy: On the principle that “like cures like”, drawing pictures of things you want to happen should help it manifest in real life. Try a chalk drawing of a rainbow down the driveway and you might either receive a real rainbow. And if you don’t, you will at least have a pretty and cheerful driveway for a while!

    Other less flammable options such as thoroughly cleaning the house may also be effective, but are also less fun.

    • underwatermagpies
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      11 months ago

      Only tiny, controlled fires, with appropriate clearance and safety measures, I promise! But I will definitely give interpretive dance and artistic homeopathy a go.

      As much as I like the fire brigade I don’t need them to visit.

    • Catfish
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      11 months ago

      Flammably cleaning the house generally not advised

      • bacon
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        11 months ago

        Bummer. I was applying for a thorough planet cleaning.