I can tell from the answers who has suffered a narcissist in their life. It’s hard to get your head around, because their behaviour is so confounding to a normal person. The thing that finally clicked for me, is for every behaviour, you have to think how is this about the narcissist. It’s about no one else. They seek adoration, admiration, power, control, status, attention. Constantly. It’s never about you, it’s ALWAYS about them. They feel bitter inside if they don’t get these things. They seek to manipulate situations so they can satisfy their needs. ‘Woe is me’, ‘look how devoted I am’, ‘I’m the most important’ etc could all be motivators. And probably others, that I can’t get my brain to think of, because to a regular person it’s baffling that a person might do something detrimental to a seriously ill person, for their own glory and control. Has nothing to do with the BIL. He’s just a convenient tool.
I am so sorry this person is in your life. It’s hard.
I have suffered terribly at the hands of narcissists and I still have so much trouble understanding what is going on. Still naive.
You wrote “Constantly.” I think that is what I need to really remember, it’s 24 hours a day and every situation for them because it’s who they are, in a way they can’t help it.
Every word, every action. They believe in nothing except themselves.
I can tell from the answers who has suffered a narcissist in their life. It’s hard to get your head around, because their behaviour is so confounding to a normal person. The thing that finally clicked for me, is for every behaviour, you have to think how is this about the narcissist. It’s about no one else. They seek adoration, admiration, power, control, status, attention. Constantly. It’s never about you, it’s ALWAYS about them. They feel bitter inside if they don’t get these things. They seek to manipulate situations so they can satisfy their needs. ‘Woe is me’, ‘look how devoted I am’, ‘I’m the most important’ etc could all be motivators. And probably others, that I can’t get my brain to think of, because to a regular person it’s baffling that a person might do something detrimental to a seriously ill person, for their own glory and control. Has nothing to do with the BIL. He’s just a convenient tool. I am so sorry this person is in your life. It’s hard.
I have suffered terribly at the hands of narcissists and I still have so much trouble understanding what is going on. Still naive.
You wrote “Constantly.” I think that is what I need to really remember, it’s 24 hours a day and every situation for them because it’s who they are, in a way they can’t help it.
Every word, every action. They believe in nothing except themselves.