If you actually have 28 children and one (and only one, not part of the set of two) leg, I will be happy to deliver and provide the item free, in exchange for a photo suitable for social media which will gain me much acclaim for my wonderful giving nature. Should you be unable to produce the 28 children for a photo, or in fact have more than one leg, delivery will be $273 on top of the item cost.
With 28 children and one leg
If you actually have 28 children and one (and only one, not part of the set of two) leg, I will be happy to deliver and provide the item free, in exchange for a photo suitable for social media which will gain me much acclaim for my wonderful giving nature. Should you be unable to produce the 28 children for a photo, or in fact have more than one leg, delivery will be $273 on top of the item cost.