Let it all out. Be a storm

  • ThatWeirdGuy1001@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    I’ve completely given up on finding someone to spend my life with. I’m 27m and I have nothing to offer outside of love. Every girl I’m even slightly attracted to already has a boyfriend. I’m not unattractive but I have resting bitch face and I’m intimidating. I’ve lived my whole life with people being afraid of me which fuels my need for companionship. I know I’m not owed anything from anyone but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t still hurt.

    Anymore I’ve just accepted that I’m going to die alone because I’m only going to be wanted for what I can provide when I just want to be fucking loved. My own family doesn’t even love me. All they can talk about is how I’m not good enough or I’m not applying myself correctly.

    I hate being a man…

    • narF@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      I understand the feeling. I’m sure you have lots to offer even if you don’t know about it yet ;)

      I agree with Akasazh. I met my first partner at 24 and it lasted 7 years before we realized it would be better to split. It took me a long time (4 years) to find someone else, at age 36. Age doesn’t matter: people find love even past 70! (my grandma!)

      This channel offered me good advices and helped me a lot. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClHVl2N3jPEbkNJVx-ItQIQ It’s much smarter than the usual youtube dating advices.

    • Shyder @lemmy.fmhy.ml
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      1 year ago

      I feel you, man.

      I’m 29 and in your same exact situation. I’m constantly reminded that I’m alone and the world isn’t made for single men. The harder I try the stronger the depression hits back since all my efforts are meaningless. And each time I talk to someone about it I just get the most cliche responses.

      I’ve just completely given up on love and accepted that I’ll be alone the rest of my life. Since it looks like it won’t be better, at least I don’t want it to be worse…

      • Scribbd@feddit.nl
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        1 year ago

        I do too. It just feels like that a bunch psychopaths hold a lot of power that is keeping us from progressing.

        All that money, hoarded like dragons, seen as a high score to beat …

    • solstice@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      It was great for a while, lifted billions out of poverty, gave us cures to diseases, air conditioning, internet, etc. But I definitely feel like we need to rethink it now. We need to protect the institutions that allow for innovation, entrepreneurialism, and capitalism, yes, because innovation is essential. But we also need to figure out how to help the tens of millions of people capitalism is leaving in the dust. Idk how to do that though.

  • OneDimensionPrinter@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I am absolutely exhausted with me and my kid’s ADHD. My wife is always upset at us because we can’t remember shit and I’ve spent my life feeling guilty because nobody will ever just give me a break.

    I’m expected to be “on” at all times and I just can’t do it forever. Sometimes I just need to do things my own, likely inefficient way, but at least at home it usually ends in being berated because I didn’t do it “the right way”.

    It’s so insanely demoralizing. I don’t even want to bother trying at anything because it will only be met with derision. What’s even the point. Fuck it all.

    Shit like that is why I still dream of disappearing forever to be alone and just left to my own devices.

    Thanks for letting me vent. Just so tired.

  • Banana@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    I am so angry. I am so sick and tired of just stating my experiences as a woman and having people who are not women straight up tell me that I’m wrong. About my own life experiences. It’s fucking exhausting to be surrounded on all sides by bad faith actors, knowing full well that you won’t get through to them, and feeling defeated, like the world is going backwards and you can feel your rights being torn away from you bit by bit, trying desperately to stand up for yourself and having any words you say fall on deaf ears. I’m so sick of not being listened to. I’m so sick of not being believed. I am so fucking sick of not being respected. I just want to be treated like a human and not be criticised for literally just fucking existing.

    I’m so done.

    • ComatoseSquirrel@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      I’m sorry you have to deal with that. I hate dealing with people enough as a man. I can’t imagine how frustrating it must be to deal with all the bullshit you are stuck with, having your opinions and experiences dismissed, etc. I hope things improve for you (and all women), but it looks like it’ll get worse before it (hopefully) gets better.

      • Banana@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        I really appreciate your comment more than you know. Just having a guy read what I wrote there and not only recognize it, but believe it and validate it means so, so much.

        I’m lucky in that I have some close male friends probably a lot like you who are willing to listen and are actively improving themselves and I am so very thankful for that.

    • limeaide@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      I’m not a woman, but I am a minority living in a racist part of the USA, and I kinda know what you’re talking about. It’s really hard. I sometimes feel crazy because people don’t believe me.

      I constantly have to play this game of, “are they being rude, do they not like me, or are they being racist?” I feel gaslighted all the time. I feel lesser and it’s tiring having to be who I am. Even people who think they are being kind are assholes. Telling me that I’m “not like the others” is such an insult to my people. “The others” are my friends and family. They are not “others” they are people to me.

      I am sorry you are going through this. Your voice matters and is valid

      Edit: Sorry for attaching my venting to yours. Pretty selfish of me now looking back

      • Banana@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Oh gosh I cant even imagine dealing with all the racist little micro aggressions you have to deal with every day. Also don’t feel bad for venting, you were just trying to relate, and I’m autistic so I relate in a very similar way. I feel for you too and I’m glad someone understands. ❤

  • CreamDrippinHoles@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I have to take care of a 3 year old with pink eye giving her antibiotic eye drops 4 times a day for a week. It’s like wrangling a greased screaming pig. She doesn’t sleep though the night from the coughing, so i dont sleep through the night. I’m all alone while my spouse is on a work trip for 2 weeks, so he gets to miss out on all of this start to finish! No daycare or taekwondo so I can get a break! No family or support! All me all alone with a shit eyed toddler and no sleep for 2 weeks straight. That’s on top of all the other agonizing responsibilities haunting me every day. I’m so tired, 10 days left…

  • kerlinnen@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Depression. I am very lonely. I have no plans for the future. Everything feels meaningless, most of all my existence.

  • BiggestBulb@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    I’m sick and tired of working for other people. Having to take PTO to do literally anything you want to do on a weekday is so fucked, and I’m one of the lucky people (who works PST while in EST). Corporate policies and politics truly do run rampant through every company, and I just need to keep working on products until one becomes sustainable long-term.

    Feel like that’s the key to financial and physical freedom - making the next big thing, then getting it to a solid state and just doing gradual improvements. Don’t pull a spez, don’t piss people off and don’t add too many new features after a while or you’ll kill what you have. And for the love of GOD, don’t go public.

    IPO’ing and going public are what kill companies with great things running for them, simply due to the “keep growing every day until the company inevitably collapses” mindset.

  • MermaidsGarden@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    I’m lonely. I broke up with my partner Valentine’s Day before last (found out she was cheating on me!). Turned 30 late last year, I work from home, and I’m not super outgoing y’know? I haven’t tried online dating since 2017 prior to this and it just sucks. It’s awful. It’s so hard to get a sense of a person on there so it ends up not being very successful. I’m sick of being in my apartment like fucking Rapunzel in the tower.

  • SturgiesYrFase@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    I’m a skilled fuckin mason. But I’ve put my notice in so I’m being given all the shit jobs on my last week. The past three days I’ve been descaling parts of the wall. What’s descaling you ask? Going over the entire wall with a hand brush and a wire brush, knocking off all the loose bits. Meanwhile their star mason is installing stones with ledges so big you could hang a fuckin coffee cup off em, and totally missing mortar on entire stones. Literally just plop em on the wall and keep going. Fuck this place, and fuck Bob specifically.

    • Bobsnoturuncle@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Shitty for them to do that to you. Would it impact your next job or your wallet so much that you can’t just tell them to fuck off and just walk away?

      • SturgiesYrFase@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        Next job no, wallet yes. And it’s just to the end of the week and I can tell me to shove their heads up each others asses

    • cantankerousnuts@lemmy.one
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      1 year ago

      Man Bob sounds like a real piece of work. Good for you, I hope you find a place that can utilize and appreciate (in the form of payment) your talents and commitment to quality of work. Best of luck internet stranger!!

  • JWBananas@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    The entirety of the first few pages of my subscription feed are all posts about Sync for Reddit and about the Logitech controller used in the submersible.

    The threadiverse has gaping fundamental flaws in its implementation. It will of course get better over time. But damn. This isn’t great.

  • Jojo-Mcfrost572@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    My rant is that I love in an existential crisis.
    I know the world sucks. I know why the world sucks and I think I have solutions to some of those issues. However how can I act upon them.

    I’m forever flip flopping on leaving everything behind and living as a nomad in a cave or trying to get into office to right the wrongs of this world.

    I’d love to leave a legacy of actually doing something worthwhile with my life as most lives are pointless.
    We are nothing. We live we die and Majority of us will destroy more than we will ever create.

    Nothing I do or most do matters. I could due tomorrow and my existence would be a footnote in an obituary. With that most things people do don’t impact on the greater humanity.

    Yet we have capacity to truly be remarkable. But to do that we need to take risks. Risks that would ultimately force us into something we do t actually want to do. Risks that would be life altering and destroy the current east life we live.
    .
    Simple question regarding bringing a child into this life. Knowing they will have a worse life than us and forcing them to exist what be a form of torture.

    Hopefully decisions will be made by fate and I won’t need to torture myself until something snubs me out. Could I make a difference it will I be forgettable like everyone else

  • archomrade [he/him]@midwest.social
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    1 year ago

    I’ve been trying to get assessed for ADHD for almost a month now, and the therapist i’ve been trying to schedule with has been dragging their feet for WEEKS.

    Both my brother and father have ADHD, my brother was diagnosed when he was a teenager but my dad was diagnosed in his 50s (I am 30). I work from home, which works great and I have no regrets, but when I get distracted, i get distracted HARD. I am constantly getting up, I have about 60 tabs open on multiple monitors, about every 30 seconds I think “I should look at xy or z” and open a new tab. When i’m not working, I have to have 2 or 3 things on at a time (read social media app redacted, have a tv show on, play with my dog, ect), and I have constant decision block in choosing how to spend my free time. It’s getting to the point where I’m up until 2am or worse towards the end of every deadline. I have a bunch of side projects I really want to dig into, but I can’t seem to maintain focus on any of them.

    My insurance covers the costs of therapy but only within network, so I feel a little hamstrung to use this therapist because they’re the closest to me and have great reviews and seem to have an approach I would appreciate, but JESUS CHRIST just respond to my fucking emails! To add to the stress, I feel very self conscious of the perception I might be fishing for drugs, and ever time I send a follow up email i feel like i’m making it look like I don’t really need help.

    I feel like i’m failing my wife, and my employer, and my friends, and I just want some help so I can get my life a little more in control. It’s exhausting.