I wear UGG boots in winter because it’s fucking cold.

I also wrap myself in a blanket on the couch, and have a lovely area rug so I don’t have to walk on a cold floor. All these things are necessary to survive the winter; my house isn’t well insulated.

The problem with all this, is that I build up a static charge. So when I go to pat my beautiful sweetheart of a dog, I zap him. It’s audible and I’m sure, quite unpleasant. Often on the head. He obviously doesn’t like that, I think he’s taking it personally, and I feel awful. It completely cancels out the affection I’m trying to show him.

So the question for the Lemmy community is:

How do I discharge the static before I pat my dog? I have started shocking my partner (which he doesn’t like, but accepts over the alternative), before patting my dog. But as he’s out tonight, I have no human vessel to offer as tribute?

What can I touch in my house before patting my dog so that he doesn’t receive a shock?

Edit: standard Australian house and furniture

Another edit: I’m all the sheets to the wind so the engineering advice is not sinking in. But I’m loving the immediate response that I’d never have gotten on Deaddit.

Again: I can’t stop giggling at how helpful everyone is being and how short m, drunk and silly I am, in a house with apparently no metal

And again: I should probably take me and my baby to bed now, but a big thank you to everyone who replied. You’ve all been lovely. Lemmy is really a different space to ask these questions! I’ll be trying out many of your suggestions over the weekend; big thanks from me and my boy x

Final: thanks to everyone who responded. I did try the kitchen tap again last night and this time it worked! Mustn’t have built up enough charge when I tried the night I posted. I will still primarily zap my partner’s leg as it’s usually closer and doing it makes me laugh. It’s important he understands where he fits in the household hierarchy as well. I also learnt that American houses are very different (screws and radiators everywhere!) so that was interesting too.

  • boogetybooOP
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    1 year ago

    Does mumbling ‘the ace of spades’ to myself over and over work? Because I was already doing that due to playing cards earlier

    • omalaul@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Contrary to popular belief the metal is in the mustache, not the lyrics. I think there was a mythbuster episode about it or something