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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Jazzlike-Meaning-189 on 2023-08-30 22:49:04.

My kid had became extremely lazy is the past few months when she wasn’t before. She didn’t want to do laundry and wouldn’t cook for herself. She neglected all of her chores and spent most of her time sleeping in her room.

I told her to do the dishes after dinner because it was her turn and she said she was too tired and went to bed. I yelled at her and called her a spoiled brat, but she didn’t care and went straight to bed. She has been frustrating to deal with.

She wasn’t doing her laundry, so I started doing it myself (because she can’t go to school in dirty clothes like she started doing) and then just poured the clothes on the floor since she was too lazy/tired to put them away. I do expect my kids to do their own laundry and also put away their clothes themselves, which she knows, but now is refusing to do.

I wouldn’t vacuum her room when it was her turn to vaccum but I did everyone elses. If she wants to be lazy and live in filth, that is her right. I made sure not to clean her bathroom or room when I’m suppose to in my weekly chores since she isn’t doing her own weekly chores to help everyone else.

But I noticed her older sister was doing things for her. When I would throw her clothes on the floor, she’d go in and fold them and put them away. Everyone besides me would still include her room in chores, and they weren’t getting onto her for not taking part. It was frustrating.

I told them all they were enabling her and needed to stop. She was going to turn into a spoiled brat that thinks everyone will do everything for her. But they kept doing it.

Well, it turns out she has lupus. She was recently hospitalized for it, and is getting treatment. My family is upset at me because they believe her being chronically ill is what led to her being tired all the time, and said I was heartless with how I treated her. The doctor agreed that was likely the case, but I didn’t know she was sick. She should have told me that she was sick. I just didn’t want her to grow up being entitled and horrible. AITA? I don’t think I was wrong in how I treated her. I was being a parent and refusing to be taken advantage of. She is 15.