I have neuropathy and it just literally does not matter what I tell 99% of people, they’ll almost all say I am lying and lazy and get angry when I tell them ‘ok, I can try to go out and do this physical thing, but I’ll be in screaming pain after an hour or two and need to rest for the next two days.’
Last two girlfriends I had literally did not give a shit, kept pushing me far beyond the limits I told them I had and then got angry at me about it.
One refused to stop going on rides at a county fair so that she could let me sit in her car before my phone died. I ended up writhing in pain outside her car for 2 hours before she noticed.
Another had me walking around for about 8 hours 3 days in a row for a convention, after we both agreed I could only do about 2 hours a day. Had to take a week off work to recover. So I paid for the whole outing, then lost a week of work pay, and the net result was she was angry I ruined the whole experience for her.
People do not fucking register non obvious illnesses. Even mental illnesses, at least among younger people, now have better social acceptance than chronic pain.
You can tell people who tell you they love you that what is easy for them is excruciating for you and they don’t understand why causing you to be in excruciating pain and then belittling you about it causes you to be angry.
I finally got SSDI and just live alone now, cut off contact with everyone. Never been less stressed out, haven’t had this good of at least mental health in over a decade.
Don’t have people constantly shaming me and guilt tripping me. So, so much less stress.
I hope you find better people in your life, my partner is also dealing with undiagnosed chronic pain (we’re going through appointments still), i can’t say i understand what you feel but i know how it affects her, and that’s probably pretty similar.
You deserve better, hope you find relief and better friends.
No this is real and happens all the time.
I have neuropathy and it just literally does not matter what I tell 99% of people, they’ll almost all say I am lying and lazy and get angry when I tell them ‘ok, I can try to go out and do this physical thing, but I’ll be in screaming pain after an hour or two and need to rest for the next two days.’
Last two girlfriends I had literally did not give a shit, kept pushing me far beyond the limits I told them I had and then got angry at me about it.
One refused to stop going on rides at a county fair so that she could let me sit in her car before my phone died. I ended up writhing in pain outside her car for 2 hours before she noticed.
Another had me walking around for about 8 hours 3 days in a row for a convention, after we both agreed I could only do about 2 hours a day. Had to take a week off work to recover. So I paid for the whole outing, then lost a week of work pay, and the net result was she was angry I ruined the whole experience for her.
People do not fucking register non obvious illnesses. Even mental illnesses, at least among younger people, now have better social acceptance than chronic pain.
You can tell people who tell you they love you that what is easy for them is excruciating for you and they don’t understand why causing you to be in excruciating pain and then belittling you about it causes you to be angry.
I finally got SSDI and just live alone now, cut off contact with everyone. Never been less stressed out, haven’t had this good of at least mental health in over a decade.
Don’t have people constantly shaming me and guilt tripping me. So, so much less stress.
I hope you find better people in your life, my partner is also dealing with undiagnosed chronic pain (we’re going through appointments still), i can’t say i understand what you feel but i know how it affects her, and that’s probably pretty similar. You deserve better, hope you find relief and better friends.
:( that’s awful, I’m glad you cut those people off. Hopefully you find better someday