Maybe your employer will accept a statutory declaration instead of a doctor’s certificate. Mine does.
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Humans can grow up to eight feet. Most of them only grow posthumously, hence the expression, “six feet under.”
Defenestratorto Dad Jokes@lemmy.world•How do you fit an elephant in a refrigerator?English2·9 months agoExplanation:
spoiler
There is no effin’ way
Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism it’s just the opposite.
“If elected, I will stop all those other sheep from crossing the border and stealing your food!”
“What creature walks on four legs in the morning, two at noon and three in the evening?”
A kobold. In the morning it scurries around on all fours, trying to get everything in order before its master wakes up. At midday, it stands at attention before its master. By the evening, it gets tired and leans on its tail a bit.
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea.
One day I’m going to play an asexual bard, just to subvert expectations.
Rocs fall, everyone dies
Did he collapse from seeing the rainbow roundabout?
Defenestratorto RPGMemes @ttrpg.network•Other than Fireball, What's the best spell for cooking?7·1 year agoThat only creates bland food.
Put them in your shopping bag and sort it out later.
Defenestratorto News@lemmy.world•Nearly 200 names linked to Jeffrey Epstein expected to be made public1·1 year agoI never expected much from Adult Porn M.D.
Disadvantage on concentration checks?
Defenestratorto Dad Jokes@lemmy.world•What did the writer say when he glued himself to his book?English2·1 year agoHe couldn’t put the book down.
I’m out of spells, but I’m not out of shells.