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this is Lemmy’s finest thread to date
My Grandfather- “I’m hungry enough to eat the ass out of a skunk”
“The Man on The Moon couldn’t see that!” (Still not sure what this means) “Tighter than a fish’s pussy” (Self-explanatory) “I was no more good” (I was shocked and surprised/amused) “Hand me that ‘little chicken’ over there, would you?” (Little Chicken replaces any and all nouns)
Went back home after like a decade and ran into my dad’s old boss from when I was a kid. His southern drawl was pronounced and nasal like a side character in an old western, "Well I ain’t seen you in a coon’s age!
“you look like 5 pounds of shit in a whore’s lunchbox”
“like a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs” in reference to watching your ass.
One I learned in the fleet was “…more fucked than a ten cent whore on a day raining dimes.”
One from my childhood in the south, would occasionally hear the adults say “my ___ hurts worse than a whore’s knees on nickel blowjob day”
I have a pretty mild one that I’ve used all my life: “Good Lord willing and the creek don’t rise.” I said it once to the owner of the company I work for and he thought I meant I wouldn’t do what he’d asked of me, and he got a little upset. I had to explain it meant the opposite. That I had to explain it to him didn’t really ease the angst of the situation…
I grew up 5 mins from West Virginia. The hillbillies were always saying wild shit like this lmao
I was bewildered regarding shitshow at work and said, “it’s like going around your butthole to get to your elbow” – the californian and the Canadian had apparently never heard this phrase before. I realized then it was a southernism 😂
“colder than a witches tittie in a brass bra”
My wife’s old dutch grandma once had a sip of beer and said “it’s like an angel pissing on my tongue”
Talking about how many children she had “your grandfather would throw his dirty undies at me and I’d get pregnant”
Grandma sounds like she could make a pirate blush :) I wanna be just like her when I grandma
“How’re we gonna fuck this pig” is my favorite. Means “how are we going to start this unpleasant task”.
Fun fact: Saying it at work can net you several funny looks and more!
My favourite is the (apparently) Australian saying “I’m so hungry a could eat the ass off a low flying duck”
Aussie slang is weapons grade language. They’re not here to fuck spiders
Hornier than a three peckered billy goat.
Busier than a one legged man in a kicking contest.
“butt kicking contest” is the way I’ve always heard it said.
