• Praise Idleness@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    94
    ·
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    Today when I walked into the Trump case court I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. A lawyer had brought their new gaming laptop to courtroom. The Forklift she used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was her laptop. She had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer’s thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I’m going to be alright and that there’s nothing to worry about. She somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The judge enters, and the lawyer turns her laptop on. The colored lights on her RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The courtroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my court and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.