Stolen from inspired by a Reddit post, now with 33% more awards shown!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bxzhF7a7sys
My head cannon is that Steven Segal films are actually just a front to launder money, because clearly no one is buying tickets and they keep making them.
Honestly they do well with my uncles, and likely a ton of dudes in Russia
My dad used to watch them on cable all the time, had a few of the vhs versions as well. The target demo did enjoy them, it’s just that no one outside of it did.
I don’t think he’s seen any of the new extremely shit ones, but the mid/late 90s movies were what you expected out of standard action flicks of the time
Oh dear, that was so bloody awful, I have real regret for watching it.
The funniest part is how he physically moves it’s like he’s can’t be bothered to fire that m4 normally and he’s so slow.
Also it’s important to remember that Segal considers himself an expert in several types of martial arts. Key words ‘considers himself’.
From the looks of it he doesn’t know what the sights are for, as I don’t think he once actually looked down them.
He continues to shoot at 0:48 when he is literally looking the opposite direction. This is a subtle nod to the fact he’s contractually entitled to hit his character’s targets.
All his martial arts expertise would be neutralised if you just make him follow you about for a couple of mins.
Love how the guns always seem to be smaller replicas, like something you’d get from Toys-R-Us. He looks like Waj in Four Lions.
Extra noticeable that he stopped receiving these kinds of awards after 2003, even though he never stopped making movies. The movies just became so bad that he isn’t even eligible for bad movie awards anymore.
There’s a YouTube channel called space ice, that just roasts every Seagal movie, I love watching those instead of the movie.
I looked up Uwe Boll to compare, Boll is somehow better and even won a real non Razzie award, I can’t imagine how since he’s such trash.
What we need is a Seagal movie directed by Boll.
Are there any video games heroes who sit the entire time?
Fighter pilots in those old shmups from the 90s.
I’m calling it now:
AFTER BURNER: THE MOVIE
Professor X
His reddit AMA was hilarious. “What’s one of the most interesting things you’ve done to one of your Russian sex slaves?” “Is it true that Gene Lebell made you shit your pants?”
He was in executive decision for like three minutes total, was he really that bad?
I think it’s more that when the movie came out, he was actually popular for braindead action movies. It was advertised heavily as a Steven Seagal movie, but he was barely in it. It was deceptive. His presence or absence didn’t affect the quality of the movie significantly either way, but it was a ‘huh’ moment in time.
I remember being pumped, I saw under siege, under siege 2, ready for the new movie and dead instantly. Shit was a big wtf moment for a 12 year old.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bxzhF7a7sys
Relinking what I posted in another comment. Tell me if you feel moved by his acting.
Dude sounds like Mitch hedberg here lol.
I don’t understand why people hate him in that movie.
The best part of that movie was Steven seagal falling to his death. It was perfect. 10/10.
If you can see him on screen, then probably.
International Tough Guy Steven Seagal
Change the a in segal to a u and it becomes Steven Seagul
That’s how is name is actually pronounced. He thought the artist “Chagall” had a cool name so he started pronouncing his own name the same way.
