Basically for most of my adult life I’ve struggled to have a life that I truly wanted. Not comparing myself to anyone else, but going from job that let me go to job that let me go. Not making ends meet. I never felt “normal.” I always felt like an anomaly.
Then the pandemic hit; while everyone else was panicking and not sure what to do for me it was–at worst–a mild inconvenience; and at the time I was working a retail job (at last feeling like I wasn’t going to get fired at the drop of a hat, which was a weird feeling). I was tech freelancing on the side, too, which is where my skill set was.
Then suddenly freelancing took off (I think it was because of the freelancing sites I was on “rotated” me to the top). I was able to quit my job, do freelancing full time. I was able to go on actual dates (since I want to get married). I moved out of my parents place. It was awesome. For once I felt “normal.” Again, while everyone was panicking I felt like I was finally going in the direction I had planned, with ease.
Then when everything was going back to “normal,” I started to lose the success that I had gained. The clients that I worked for during the pandemic didn’t seem interested in continuing working. I’ve since had to fight every day to get back to what my normal was (which was everyone else’s unusual season).
Anyone else feel this? Pre and post pandemic was chaotic, and the pandemic for me felt like I was finally getting somewhere in life. I realize a lot of folks died because of COVID (and many more families split because of it), but it just angers me whenever people talk about the “new normal” when there wasn’t a “normal” for me to begin with.
Pandemic was great for me. I was able to get my Master’s degree online, which generally would have been looked down upon prior to the pandemic as not being a “real” degree or being as rigorous, but since everything was virtual, I was getting the exact same course material online as I was as the in person students. I quit my horrible job and I got a great remote job. The market was great at the time, so I managed to land a job where my company was headquartered in a very high cost of living area. They paid me the same salary as their other workers. Without the pandemic I never would have been considered. My husband’s job became remote as well. He and I have become way closer during the pandemic and have lots of time to spend with our kids and dogs. I will never go back to working in an office every again. I have severe social anxiety and my job is located in a state that would take me 2 days to drive to, so I am not expected to come to the office ever, except for once a year there’s a fun day where they go to do some kind of outdoor event. It’s really been so great. I also hate wearing business clothes (don’t even like putting on a bra), so I get to be comfortable. I see a lot of jobs offered are now hybrid or back to in person, and I refuse to respond to recruiters about any of those. I don’t care if they are trying to go back to the old normal. The old normal sucked. I still wear a face mask every where I go, and I haven’t had so much as a cold since early 2020. Three whole years without any sickness. And I just traveled out of town and sat in a plane full of people coughing all over. In “normal” times I would have just gotten sick right away and spent half my vacation fighting some weird bug I caught on the plane. In these times where I am super careful, wash my hands constantly and wear a mask when indoors, I don’t get sick at all. It’s amazing, I don’t know why we don’t keep doing it. Does everyone just like getting sick every flu season?
I could have written this post, right down to the social anxiety. I can’t imagine going back to my old “normal”.