• Trae@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    If you ever find yourself wondering why thereā€™s people out there that donā€™t speak up about trans hate, just go reread your original reply to me. My comment was nothing close to hateful or bigoted, but youā€™re not gonna tolerate wrong speak on lemmy.

    You clearly could see where I was coming from and where my support is directed. Instead of total indifference to my comment, which would have been the bare minimum amount of attention you could give to it. You decided to take umbrage with me saying ā€œbiologicalā€ instead of what makes you happy and throw out intersex groups that make up a fraction of a percent of the entire population like an uno reverse card.

    Then to cap it off you made sure to declare that Iā€™ve been ā€œproperly educatedā€, so sayeth you. So from here on out, I need to use the right language orā€¦ else?

    Iā€™m not quite sure what your final edict was supposed to imply. That if I donā€™t use the right language my trans friends wonā€™t talk to me anymore? Iā€™ll get kicked out of the gay club?

    Instead of leaving it, you had to make it a point to punch down on someone who isnā€™t as ā€œinformedā€ as you and put me on blast like I just said the N word equivalent for trans persons.

    Seriously, itā€™s great you want to help spread awareness, but damn you took a super hostile and adversarial tone right off the bat.

    Just calling my shot here. I wrote all this out on my phone and it will not be well received despite the fact that thereā€™s members of trans alliance and advocacy groups who disagree with your position and disagree with the use of ā€œASABā€. Thereā€™s people within the community who dislike using the term trans as a catch all.

    Where do you personally draw the line? Are you going to stop saying ASAB now that you know some people donā€™t like it? Are you going to keep saying ā€œtransā€ even though some people feel like it marginalizes the community and feels too informal to discuss complex gender identities?

    Gender Dysphoria Alliance

    The Problem with saying ASAB

    Columbia Law Review

    For whatever reason people online are more interested in being outraged.

    • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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      7 days ago

      I didnā€™t take umbrage with your original comment. I just pointed out that itā€™s wrong and you should stop. I was annoyed when you seemed to double down.

      Intersex people are just clear that ā€œbasic biologyā€ is a non-functioning understanding of what biology is. Intersex people couldnā€™t exist if what you learned in high school bio was the end. Itā€™s a clear indication that sex is not just some binary thing. Itā€™s a very complex thing. Even non-intersex people have different developments in the growth due to different hormone levels and other things, and we can even control hormone levels artificially. Itā€™s very complex, and the only useful term is AFAB/AMAB, and then more detailed medical records.

      Then to cap it off you made sure to declare that Iā€™ve been ā€œproperly educatedā€, so sayeth you. So from here on out, I need to use the right language orā€¦ else?

      Yeah, use the more accurate language, or else we know youā€™re choosing not to. Nothings going to happen. Everyone gets to make choices in life. I canā€™t make you do anything, but from one cis-gendered person to another, itā€™s not difficult to be better. Itā€™s just a choice.

      Youā€™re getting really offended by someone just informing you the language you used was wrong. It wasnā€™t even a particularly insulting comment.

      Where do you personally draw the line? Are you going to stop saying ASAB now that you know some people donā€™t like it? Are you going to keep saying ā€œtransā€ even though some people feel like it marginalizes the community and feels too informal to discuss complex gender identities?

      I rarely have a use for either term, so I draw the line where itā€™s useful for others. If youā€™re a doctor, thatā€™s where it matters, and after gender confirmation, your ā€œsexā€ is a lot more complicated. After a while or hormone therapy, youā€™re more akin to your chosen sex than your birth sex. Thatā€™s why the ā€œbiologically male/femaleā€ term isnā€™t useful. Itā€™s assuming their birth sex is their current sex for medical purposes, but itā€™s more complex than that. Sex assigned at birth is useful because it limits it to that period specifically, and your medical records tell the whole story.

      The AEI article you posted seems to ignore this fact. It seems to say your birth sex is the important factor. Itā€™s just one of many. For future development, the one your hormones correspond with is likely more important.

      The CLR article mirrors what Iā€™ve said earlier:

      ā€œBy referring instead to sex assigned at birth, transgender rights advocates convey that ā€œbiological sexā€ is not simple, static, or binary and that gender identity also has biological aspects.ā€

      For whatever reason people online are more interested in being outraged

      I agree. People should be more calm, even when corrected. Being outraged doesnā€™t help. It only acts to cement our mind in preconceived ideas. Changing our minds when provided more information that counters our previous beliefs is something that should be commended, not fled from.

      • Trae@lemmy.world
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        7 days ago

        Got it.

        I apologize.

        Youā€™re a the most qualified person on the internet for cisgender, trans, and intersex word policing.

        Now that I know and if I donā€™t change, youā€™ll make sure to report it to the cisgender police for trans activities special victims unitā€¦

        Itā€™s interesting you chose the statement ā€œitā€™s not difficult to be better, itā€™s just a choiceā€. You could have started this entire interaction with ā€œhey dude, just a heads up that a lot of transphobes use phrases like ā€˜biological maleā€™ to invalidate trans identitiesā€, but instead you took the opportunity to speak down to me and made sure I was now ā€œeducatedā€ and that I can stop using wrong speak.

        Thank God youā€™re here as an ally to make people question why those of us on this side of the fence canā€™t even get along internally.

        • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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          7 days ago

          Youā€™re a the most qualified person on the internet for cisgender, trans, and intersex word policing.

          I definitely am not.

          Now that I know and if I donā€™t change, youā€™ll make sure to report it to the cisgender police for trans activities special victims unitā€¦

          I havenā€™t reported or downvoted you.

          Itā€™s interesting you chose the statement ā€œitā€™s not difficult to be better, itā€™s just a choiceā€. You could have started this entire interaction with ā€œhey dude, just a heads up that a lot of transphobes use phrases like ā€˜biological maleā€™ to invalidate trans identitiesā€, but instead you took the opportunity to speak down to me and made sure I was now ā€œeducatedā€ and that I can stop using wrong speak.

          I donā€™t think I spoke down to you, but you are welcome to your opinion. I tried to inform you.

          • Trae@lemmy.world
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            7 days ago

            ā€œI donā€™t think I spoke down to you, but you are welcome to your opinion. I tried to inform you.ā€

            Really? You seriously can re-read your comment and donā€™t see how shitty it comes across when addressing it to someone who used a word you disagree with unwittingly?

            ā€œAssigned male at birth is the term you want to use. ā€œBiological maleā€ is a term used by transphobes to spread misinformation.ā€

            Not informative at all. Itā€™s you telling me what word I want to use, while implying Iā€™m a transphobe attempting to spread misinformation.

            " Biology is very complex and not your elementary school version of biology. What makes someone ā€œbiologicallyā€ male? Is it having a penis, having testis, having more testosterone than estrogen, having XY chromosomes? These can all be intermixed with other characteristics."

            Hereā€™s the fun part where you state I have an elementary level understanding of biology.

            ā€œThe ā€œbasic biologyā€ definition doesnā€™t work in the real world, and the people using it are actively trying to harm trans people or ignorant. Now youā€™re more informed so ignorance isnā€™t an excuse anymore.ā€

            Hereā€™s the cherry on top where you talk about me not knowing how to discuss complex topics in the real world or that I may be actively trying to harm trans people at worst or ignorant at best. Lastly, in case you know Iā€™m not a transphobe that my ignorance can no longer be an excuse.

            You seriously couldnā€™t possibly think of any other combination of words to get your point across without making me out to be someone thatā€™s intentionally skirting the line of ignorance and bigotry in an effort to harm trans people?