Anyone here have a loved one with dementia?

  • Ilandar
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    2 months ago

    Yes, my grandmother has middle stage Alzheimer’s. She was diagnosed a few years ago after a few years of what I guess were early stage symptoms (though I didn’t recognise them as such at the time). It is very challenging for my grandfather, who has been married to her for over 65 years at this point. He has his own issues physically and is also quite forgetful, so attempting to care for her 24/7 is a massive weight. The whole family has been helping out, some are doing the cleaning, some are taking them out for activities, my partner and I cook and deliver some of their meals. They receive some government assistance as well but I don’t handle any of that so I’m not sure how extensive it is currently.

    It is very surreal to see her in this state because she was always extremely chatty and would call the younger ones into the kitchen for the weekly dinners she would host so she could talk our ears off with some educational lesson about cooking or something. She would routinely have 1+ hour phone calls with members of the family and it was genuinely difficult to exit a conversation with her because she could just talk endlessly without ever getting bored. I used to find that annoying but now it’s just sad to think about, she can’t hold an extended conversation with anyone and it feels like so much of her personality has disappeared so quickly. She usually seems okay whenever I see her and we can have some short conversations and show each other love but some of the stories from my mum (who spends a lot more time with her) are disturbing.

    I’m sorry if that was a grim read but I just thought I’d share anyway, so you know there’s someone else here experiencing something similar. I don’t have any advice or anything but I’m happy to chat about it if you ever feel like sharing more.

    • maniacalmanicmaniaOP
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      2 months ago

      Thank you 🙏 it wasn’t grim. The first night after finding out and realising why dad was struggling was difficult. The diagnosis has woken him up and he’s been more agreeable to letting us all help him and finally admitting some things are beyond him and will progressively get worse.