You have to realize American culture and society is one based on greed and selfishness. We’re bombarded with the philosophy that we should all be Rugged Individualists, or Got Mine, F@#k You. The Powers That Be think everything is transactional, and everything should have a monetary cost. Selfishness is a virtue, kindness is weakness, and empathy is for women and the weak. So, dump grandma in a nursing home with employees being paid $10 an hour, and go live your best life! YOLO!

That said, not all Americans are this, or believe these things, at least no consciously. But it’s all pervading in our culture.

It depends. My mom wanted to break even when she died. Not leave us money, and not cost us money, but did rely on my sister to help out, not financially much but with some care. I sent maybe $500 total towards that, so pretty close to what she wanted.

Husband’s parents are loaded, but if his mom needed care I’d help because she has been so nice to me, I was t close with my mom but have been lucky in mothers in law. I don’t expect anything from them, think their plan is to skip us and leave some to the grandkids, but in any case they are rich-ish and do not expect anything in the way of financial help.

I took time off to raise my kids, so don’t expect to retire but no, I would hope to not need financial help and don’t expect it from them. It’s a win if they don’t need any financial help from me!

In your case, if your parents sacrificed their future income to raise you, I understand why you feel you owe them, but I don’t really think that way, you don’t accrue debt for being raised. It’s more like whoever ends up best off helps the others, so my most successful daughter wants to be “the rich uncle” who can do that, she helps out her sisters, and my hope is like my mom’s - to not burden them and to die with close to nothing.

Maybe your culture is lying to you.

There’s no one right answer. It totally depends on you, your parents, and your dynamic. Did/do your parents treat you like shit? Did they blow through their all of their retirement money in 5 years? Are they in a 800k empty house but refuse to downsize for no good reason?

You are basing so much on a YouTube video.

Jeez this is a good reminder of how people get influenced by media.

It really should be contextual. Every family is different, and each familial relationship is different.

I’ve heard him say children don’t owe their parents money just because they’re their parents, and I’d agree with that statement. The parents are the ones who decide to have the baby, how to raise them, etc, so i think it’s wrong if parents think they’re entitled to their children’s money.

But that doesn’t mean a child should never help their parents out financially. Morally, if you love your parents and can swing it, I think the right thing to do is help your parents if they need it. But there’s a big difference between asking a child to help and feeling entitled to a child’s help.

No most Americans do end up supporting their parents. On the other hand, I think most Americans would agree that their parents don’t deserve financial support merely for being their parents. You support your family because you like them and not because it’s a requirement.

Also, I think a lot of younger people begrudge their parents for not handling their own financials better, especially as the younger generations see how much harder some things are than they used to be.

For example, my in-laws collectively make over 6 figures and inherited a house decades ago that’s worth almost a million dollars due to housing inflation. They absolutely could have a reasonable retirement plan, but they don’t. They spend money as fast as they get it and won’t be passing their house down like their parents did because they have multiple large loans against the house. They use this money to go on vacations every other month and own more vehicles than they really need. They also mentioned to me recently that they would like it if we could try to buy a house with extra rooms for when they get old and need to be taken care of.

I’m not going to let my wife’s parents be homeless when they inevitably can’t work, but I do find it somewhat infuriating that their lack of planning is going to cost me potentially a huge amount of money.

Last, just to add more confusion to this, there are a number of US states which have familial responsibility laws. These laws mean that you can be found legally liable for certain debts accumulated by your parents. This is the exception rather than the norm but it does demonstrate that Americans aren’t actually as independent as they would have you believe.

I’m not American, but in my culture it is not that deep rooted, that you have to care for your parents.
Maybe because we have a public pension system. But when the pension is not enough and a person has to relay on social security authorities will check the income of all direct relatives. Depending on your income you are obligated to support your kids and parents.

We just do what we need to do. If my parents needed help and I could help them, I would. Right now I need help and they’re helping me. I’m just trying to get back on my feet so I can be ready to help whem im finally needed.

I think it’s a north American thing. In a lot of cultures around the world you are expected to take care of your parents, either financially or in terms of letting them live with you. Because… You know… They took care of you when you needed it the most?

You went off to a different country and things are much different.

In the US, generally, parents by retirement age have paid for their homes by then, have retired with benefits from their employer that will give them some money every month, have social security that also pays them every month (both of these are taken out of each paycheck throughout their career lives) and don’t have many bills.

So by the time they’re old, if they were responsible and held ok jobs, they should need money less than you need it. Our US system is basically set up to make you work hard for 40 ish years and then you’re taken care of when you’re old, for the most part. If your parents need money and you have money to give, there’s nothing wrong or against it. It’s still a common thing. But ideally, doing that shouldn’t be needed.

First of all, Ramsey is an asshole. Second, the kind of USAmericans that do this are the ones that have bought the American Individualism^TM propaganda.

Middle, upper-middle, and upper class=wealth flows down.

If you’re poor, and sometimes just not white, wealth flows where it’s needed. Coworkers were very confused why I’m trying to save money to help my parents – who do and have always rented – when they’re too old to work.

Like they literally struggled to wrap their minds around the idea that a) not only can my parents not afford to retire, b) they can’t afford care when they can no longer work, c) they currently take care of my grandma who is in that position right now, d) I don’t, haven’t, and won’t be receiving some sort of windfall in the form of property or money even they die, e) the best off of me and my siblings are who tries to help out financially for the siblings that are having tougher times not our parents.

They looked at me like I had grown a second head, but I work around almost exclusively upper middle class white people.

Ramsey has some views that don’t align with everyone. The important thing to keep in mind is that America is so diverse, your neighbor could be a different religion and most of us (despite what media will lead you to belive) don’t give a fuck.

If I were to re-work the advice to be less extreme, I’d say don’t put your self in a finacial struggle trying to help your parents.

Turn that shit off