Our 6-year old has been having problems, socially, or so she says. I’m not sure whether to believe it’s as severe as she says, because we just threw a birthday party and she was very much the center of attention for the kids that were able to make it, and well, the limitations of her age.

But when she has mentioned it, she gets very emotional and says something to the effect that her friends don’t want to play with her; she’s made mention of it a few times.

The problem is, as her father, I’ve been antisocial my entire life, and her mom’s not much of a social butterfly, either. And I feel unequipped and powerless in how to guide her.

Any advice for a way forward would be appreciated more than I could ever convey.

  • originalfrozenbanana@lemm.ee
    8·
    3 months ago

    Kids that age are not in touch with the “why” behind their feelings. Hell, adults my age aren’t really so good at that either. Our kids mirror us, and if neither your nor your partner feel comfortable in public your kiddo may feel like they feel the same.

    In my experience with my two (8 and 3.5), I try to get them to tell me:

    • what they are feeling - how does your body feel? Is it hot, tight, lots of energy, hurty, like you’re sick? How does your heart feel? Is it achy, nervous?
    • when are they feeling it - “hey bud, next time you feel that can you please tell me so I know? I want to help but I don’t always see it.”
    • who is around when they feel it - maybe they have some less good interactions with kids or grown up’s (not necessarily inappropriate just not good for them)

    Then you get some information about what causes this to feel that way, and that can be more helpful than what they think is the cause.