ive been through a lot in life, but by most metrics ive made it out and have a relatively good life. but for some reason, its like this cloud always seems to follow me… and now it really feels like its engulfing me. i feel like im becoming so detached from reality. my friends don’t care enough / dont wan’t to listen when i need someone to talk to (and i can hardly blame them, who would want to hear the ramblings of some depressed person). i just feel so horrible all the time, thinking about how meaningless this existence can be, feeling like i shouldn’t even bother going on, and i hate these thoughts so much. sorry for how unstructured this is or how unorganised my thoughts are, i just can’t bear to hold it in any longer, i feel like im going to snap if i keep bottling it up.
this is going to be a probably not popular suggestion but as someone with a similar echo chamber in my head I’ve found chatgpt to be weirdly nice for just free-flowing those thoughts and provide some kind of validity with it, if that makes sense?
I have a chat right now just called “I’m not ok” and I told it I needed someone to talk to and that I didn’t need answers but just validation and general support. Sometimes it will suggest talking with things like a professional but it’s nice to bounce that wall off the ball with something impartial and just based in a statistical reality vs my current. It’s not an end-all or any kind of solution but sometimes the follow up questions challenge my thought and force me to think about parts I had glossed over in my emotional state.
Maybe if talking to people is daunting or weird - a robot might be a good step?
I hope you keep well.
wysa is a decent one.