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    4 months ago

    Ehh, that’s a self-selecting feature there mate. You don’t want to be with someone who communicates through inscrutable clues and then becomes upset if you don’t pick up on them or read them wrong. That’s a recipe for an emotional bad time.

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        4 months ago

        Some people play those mindgames not because they believe in them, but because they believe that’s how you’re supposed to act when dating. This is particularly common for younger people with less dating experience, and is often introduced/reinforced by media narratives. I think you’ll find that being direct while also very courteous and polite will have the best results as you may catch someone who is actually thankful not to have to go through the rigamarole of silly dating games.

        Something along the lines of:

        “Hey, so I think you’re really interesting and I’d love to grab a coffee/drink/meal with you sometime if you’re interested”.

        If you face any resistance whatsoever, back down politely. Something like:

        “No problems at all! Thanks for being direct with me, I really appreciate it. Let me know if you change your mind.”

        You’ll put off people who want to be chased but trust me - they never tire of the chase and you definitely will before they do. I’ve been with someone before who needed to be chased and it’s exhausting. This method means you’re whittling down potential dates which may seem difficult at the time but you’ll thank yourself for it later.

        Fingers crossed you meet someone you vibe with mate!